Fear

Just when everything is going on well.. i fear that all these little ‘happiness’ will be taken away from me… you know… just like that *snaps fingers*

In about 2.5 mths time, i’ll be back in SG for a short vacation.. without BH that is… oh well.. the main pt is to do slight reno of our flat.. alone 🙁 I am looking forward and yet… afraid… don’t really like to mk decisions alone… not what I envisioned how things will be

when i’m away.. i’m also afraid that BH won’t miss/think about me .. then he might slowly realise that ” without Amanda… things is so much easier and better…” sigh…. I am not having PMS.. but sometimes.. I already feel that way… like… the only reason I’m here is to be his personal chef? other than that.. he plays his silly NBA computer games.. he doesn’t need me

or maybe… I’m the one who don’t need him anymore

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